Dear J.T. & Dale: I’ve been interviewing, and I’m experiencing random changes in the nervousness factor. I could go to interview 1 and be a total nervous wreck, and then later that afternoon go to interview 2 and bring my A game, not once feeling any nervousness at all. What is that all about? — Sarah

Dale: Somewhere deep in your brain are sets of thought patterns — think of them as playlists on your mental iPod. Something about an interview might push the Play button on anxiety, and then what happens? You worry that you’re getting worried. But you don’t have to listen to that. With some practice, you can choose the playlist. The one I recommend for an interview is to replay in your mind your best moments in your old jobs. You learn to push the Play button on those good memories, and they drown out your worries.

J.T.: Another way to switch playlists is to move the focus off of yourself and, instead, onto getting to know the people who are interviewing you. Be sure to give off a warm, engaging impression by asking questions about their experience with the firm:

How did you come to work for XYZ?

What is your favorite part about working here?

Can you give me any feedback on what I could do to be a better match for this position?

These questions will help you make a stronger connection with the person interviewing you AND give you an opportunity to let them do the talking so you can take the pressure off of yourself.