Dear J.T. & Dale: I’m looking for a sanity check. In May 2007, I was lucky enough to get an excellent job right out of college. But recently, I’ve begun to feel enormously frustrated. My co-workers give me very little respect. It crushes me when I’m treated like the office idiot. I’ve been looking for ways out, but never seem to get very far. I read every book or blog posting that says “job” and “happiness” in the title. Am I going crazy? — Shana

J.T.: There are plenty of workplaces capable of making employees question their sanity, and when that happens, things usually end badly. I worked with one young man whose boss was a downright bully. I encouraged him to look for a new job, but in his mind, he had invested so much in that position that he felt as if leaving would be giving up and losing. Well, guess what? He eventually got let go. The reality is that he had evolved as an employee and no longer fit the company culture. So when it came time for cuts, he was among the first.

Dale: Please tell us there’s a happy ending to that story.

J.T.: Yes; it took getting fired to end the death grip his old job had on him. At first he was nervous about being unemployed, but within a couple of weeks he was getting interviews, and within a month he was working for a new firm and flying high.

Dale: Glad to hear it. What troubles me in your case, Shana, is your mention of being treated as “the office idiot,” without any mention of any other employees receiving such shabby treatment. So it may have transpired that you slipped into what’s known as a “set up to fail” syndrome. Perhaps you made a couple of rookie mistakes, and management and co-workers decided they needed to “keep an eye on you.” What that means is they started watching for mistakes, and people tend to find what they look for. Naturally, this would shake your confidence and make you second-guess yourself.

J.T: But would that change the recommendation that Shana needs a new job?

Dale: Maybe. I agree that she should start to look for something new; however, while she is looking, she could see about turning around the current situation. I’d urge anyone in her situation to go to a colleague or two, tell them that your goal is to earn a new reputation, and ask for their advice. Then you seek their feedback every week or two. That way, they’ll start to look for things done right instead of just those gone wrong, and they’ll find themselves rooting for you. Learning to manage your image at work is an important skill, one that might salvage the old job or be available to create a “set up to succeed” syndrome at a new one.