Dear J.T. & Dale: One of our team members who’s a step above me management-wise is particularly difficult to work with. He feels the need to constantly belittle everyone. Several of us have approached the manager with our complaints. The manager takes things into “consideration,” yet nothing is ever done. - Emma

J.T.: Sounds like you’ve run up against a “power pusher.” I know the type. And his power, although negative and difficult, is succeeding. Want to stop his surge? Then cut off his energy supply. The next time he does something that upsets and disrupts the effectiveness of your team, grab another employee who feels the same way (there is force in numbers), and then ask to meet with him and the manager. Don’t say why, just say it’s important. Then, when you get together, present the situation as you and your team member see it, focusing on how his action is affecting the team’s ability to do its work effectively.

DALE: You say that you “know the type.” Maybe too well - you sound as though you’re taking this personally. The meeting you suggest is merely a confrontation, and, from the manager’s point of view, that’s trouble. Which makes Emma what? A troublemaker. Further, she’s bound to end up making an enemy of someone higher up in the organization.

J.T.: No. The key is to NOT make it personal. The most important thing, Emma, is to not act angry, just act concerned and confused. That way, the bully can’t feed off your emotion and power up. Yes, he might get angry and try to make your life more difficult at first, but soon the power will shift in your favor.

DALE: Or, you can try letting management manage and find better ways of doing your own job, despite the difficult team member. Remember that old magic phrase, “Do it anyway.” Stop blaming this guy for the department’s problems and start finding solutions anyway. If you think of him as just another challenge, your mind and spirits - even your soul - will rise up and find creative ways to neutralize his negativity. Done properly, you’ll even be able to laugh about it.

J.T.: Maybe that’s worth a try, but I’m betting that the real solution is to get the department to rise up with you. So, Emma, you have two options: Let us know which method you try and what transpires.