Dear J.T. & Dale: My husband got laid off in November. He’s gotten only three interviews since that time. He recently had a good round of interviews, and today he was offered a job. But the salary is only half of what he was making. He wants to turn it down, but I think he should take it. His ego is so bruised that he can’t imagine doing the job knowing he’s being paid so much less than what he feels he’s worth. What can I say to persuade him? — Maureen

J.T.: The talent market is not dissimilar from the housing market. Both have dropped because demand has fallen and supply hasn’t. It’s tempting to shout “NOT FAIR” and try to drown out what the market is saying, but that’s the emotional mind talking, not the logical one.

Dale: I guess that means you’re agreeing with Maureen: Take the job.

J.T.: Exactly. It’s the market — nothing personal, just the market.

Dale: However, if you’re going to persuade your husband, Maureen, you can’t do it by telling him to listen to the market and ignore his ego — egos hate that. Besides, if he grudgingly takes the job, his performance will sink to match the pay. Instead, he has to jump into the new job ready to be worth three times what they’re paying him.

J.T.: He can persuade himself to do that if he acknowledges that the sooner he gets working, the sooner he’ll have the chance to work on his skill set and make himself more valuable in the future.

Dale: Yes, hiring managers are skeptical of people who’ve been out of work too long, so if he waits, his bargaining position will get weaker, not stronger. And then one last thing that I implore you to do: We men get confused about the difference between our “net worth” and our “worth.” Dumb, but there it is. So do not let him imagine that you’ll think less of him for making less money. To return to J.T.’s analogy: Make sure he knows that you’re still crazy about the house, even if its market value has fallen.