Dear J.T. & Dale: I fell into an abusive relationship four years ago, and when I fought back, we both were arrested. I also received a DUI around the same time. I then met a wonderful man, and we married two years ago. However, we had to file bankruptcy this past year. Other than all that, my life is finally on the upswing — only NO ONE will hire me. How do I go about informing an employer about my past during the interview, because once they get my background check, I get denied. — Jodi

Dale: I volunteer at a men’s center where a goodly percentage of the guys have been incarcerated or homeless. Yet, they routinely find employers to give them a chance. Listen to this: One resident was hired by a gentleman who started by paying him in anything but cash. This new employer paid the man’s rent and bought him food, but only after a couple of months did he start to get a regular paycheck. He knew, you see, that his new hire was an alcoholic and that walking-around money would be too tempting. There are plenty of these workaday saints among us. Not all the men find saints, but all find jobs. All. Some go with small, local employers who don’t do background checks. Some go with giant firms, such as Wal-Mart, that are willing to be open-minded.

J.T.: You can start by avoiding jobs that automatically screen you out based on background. For help with this, visit governmental job agencies or staffing firms. (Just put “job assistance” and your city into Google.) They’re likely to be familiar with companies willing to hire individuals with a criminal background. But before you start, there is a useful primer online at www.Wikihow.com, including an article on job hunters with criminal backgrounds. It’s time for you to go beyond accepting your past, to embracing it. You are grateful for the life you’re now living, as you’ll be for a chance to prove to an employer that you’re a positive addition. Talk about your past in terms of gratitude for the future, and you’ll find someone who’s happy to give you a chance.